Supposed to say IM PRETTY SURE.
Me. Im having this conversation. With myself, with others, with my kids.
My focus won’t be on virginity.
My focus is & will be on:
✔️what is sex? Why do people have it? (For an array of reasons by the way. Not just procreation).
✔️sexual intimacy is *not just* pen in V. It’s not about avoiding that at all costs while using another persons body as much as possible to almost satisfy hormones or biological need/desire.
✔️ as my kids reach new, natural, typical developmental stages & phases (ps…sexual expression like self pleasure often begins around age 2.5) I help them grow confidence & competence. Naming body parts & also cleanliness & boundaries of places/time appropriate for self pleasure.
✔️ bodily autonomy for their self *and others* // they need to ask before climbing into laps, hugging, playing with hair, etc. And also, people need to ask them & they’re allowed to say no.
✔️as much kids enter online media age (not there yet, but so soon!), I’ll be sure they know the media make people & things look different than how they actually are. In fact we already talk about this in regards to race/minority groups, the lgbtq+ community. We will just also eventually be talking about how sex is often also displayed.
✔️ over all, I will continue to do my best to teach my kids bodies are sacred. Bodies deserve utmost respect. Bodies aren’t for using & abusing. Bodies, ours & others, belong to that person & that person alone. And anybody *married or not* who decides to share their body with them, that’s an honor & privilege: not a right. And anybody who they share their body with (even regards to hugs), that’s a privilege & honor, not a right.
I’m pretty sure God cares more about respect, actual true consent, & serving one another more than “saving yourself for your spouse.”
But hey! I may be wrong. And if I am, I know I care about those things more.
A single mom to three boys working hard to live my truest life. I hope as I share the beauty, the gratitude, the grief, the hard…you find inspiration + hope to show up to your life as honestly as possible.