"Choosing to Create Pain in the Hopes to Gain.."

BrokenBroken is this world I call home the only place I've really known. Where my family raised me from child to full grown. Broken and a constant battle pain rattling in my heart as I am pushed off my saddle reminded that on one another they tattle, to me. Each pained and hurt by the other for some reason or another they slander each other, calling me to explain their sides while I sit in the middle, trying not to cry, keeping each of their thoughts about one another inside of me how can I guide them to become unified? I would love to continue to provide a safe place for them to confide but if I am honest, I am merely a human whose heart is being pried.

Dear ones, Your hearts are so precious & as you slander it depresses me. I won't even pretend to imagine the bend the Father's heart is in, bringing Him grief as you allow the thief to steal any love that was once there, or so I believe.

I love them each deeper than my words will ever reach but their various needs, I simply cannot meet.

Human am I fickle & weak, while their anger towards each other is all they choose to see. Who is to blame for this and for that while we're at it, let's throw names with a spikey bat. Choosing to create pain in the hopes to gain, but really if we're honest we're throwing our own hearts in front of a freight train. Insane it all feels spinning my heart's wheels as the night spirals into disdain. The rain of their anger feels like hail upon my back simply knowing that their own flesh they're trying to attack.

Broken Broken is this earth where sin was let in bringing death to spread to everyone, for everyone sinned. Through this sin many more were bore only to allow the One who adores to pour an abundance of grace galore. Grace Jesus' grace is sufficient for you & for me my deepest most desire is for you to see you do not need to be under this curse, but you can be set free. Freedom is beautiful, I promise you that you become usable in this spiritual combat. Grace will save you every day but it was bought with a price we should have each paid. I crave for you to know this I yearn for your freedom I'll do my best to show you all the while my love deepens. Although deep love brings deep aches it is worth the heartbreak for the sake of possibly watching you be remade. Oh the beauty of that day when you hand over your heart, your mind, your soul For that precisely, I'll continue to pray. Saved by faith and nothing more it's all too simple, for your salvation I will implore. To be restored and completely set free, is so much richer than what you think you want to be your pursuits in this world will only create debris I plea for you to see: His design is perfect & whole.. stop filling those holes with the lust of this world: control. A goal is to boldly tell you all these things but I'm waiting on perfect timing from my King. While I wait I will pray and and I will sing "Glory to God, the king of all kings."